Saturday, January 19, 2008

Black Coffee.

I don't usually indulge or go to "those" generic coffee places. I always feel like I am in a mall or something, and by principle, and for the sake of good urban design, I am against all malls in general, and big box department stores. As much as possible, I support the neighborhood café and/or grocer... and you should do the same whenever you can.

I was working today; I woke up in a hurry, and didn't get the chance to grab a "good" coffee at home. When I got to the office, I found out that we did not have "good" coffee anymore. (By "good" coffee, I mean fair trade).

Drinking a Coke at 9 a.m. did not seem to be such a great idea right, so what the hell, I'll go down to the corner, and grab a fast generic coffee from one of those big-chain-cafés.

- Aaaand, what would you like this morning sir?
- One large coffee please.
- What would you like in it?
- Nothing thanks. Just the coffee?
- No Milk?
- No.
- No Cream?
- No thank you.
- Would like some whipped cream on top?
- Whipped cream on my coffee? No, no thank you.
- That'll be 1.58, aaaaand just give me a minute sir.

.... (less than a minute goes by)

- Aaaaand, here you go sir.
- Thank you.
- Euh sir! This is just a black coffee... Nothing in it. (Before she hands it to me).

.... (me sighing)

- Ma'am! What did I ask you for?
- Black Coffee!
- And what is this?
- Black Coffee!
- Then give me the fucking cup Bitch!

Can't a guy get a normal cup of coffee anymore!!!

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At 7:48 PM, Blogger Coco said...

I'm guessing it was too freaking freezing cold to smile and take it easy? :)

At 2:17 AM, Blogger Kio said...

one of my favorite posts today.

I think I'm gonna grab a cup of coffee myself;


At 12:47 PM, Blogger poshlemon said...


you remind me of myself. I don't like malls and I don't like any of those big-chain-cafes as you say. I cannot understand all the frenzy about them and the fact that a simple cup of coffee would cost double the price it should! Add to it, I totally get the impatience ;) hehe

At 2:36 PM, Anonymous nado said...

ma byfahmou b canada shu ya3ne ahwi bala wala shi :P

b7ebek hayek!! bala walashiiiiii ;)

At 6:29 PM, Blogger Mirvat said...

ouffffffff, i share your frustration

At 8:04 PM, Blogger shoesthatfit said...

i go thru this all the time coz that's exactly how i take my coffee - black with nothing in it. i can empathise.

what gets me is that even when i receive the coffee, the staff almost always insist i take a stirrer/ spoon?! ... but there is nothing in it moron.

At 8:26 PM, Blogger Marge said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 8:27 PM, Blogger Marge said...

You were so gentle with her... If I were you I would have lost my temper way before she handed me the black coffee!

At 4:22 AM, Blogger Krys said...

hahaha same version everywhere
"ce sera tout mme?"


"voous voulez pas du lait avec"

"non madame juste ca"

"ah bon... meme pas une pression de noisette"

"non non"

"pression vanille?"

"euh excusez moi je suis en retard!! je peux avoir juste le cafe"

"tenez madame... je vous souhaite une bonne fin d'apres midi et a revoir"

"yeah yeah au revoir... drop dead"

"pardon mme??"

euh rien du tt, bonne fin d'apres midi a vous aussi mme"

And this is how you spend 15 min to get a coffee in Paris on ur 3 min break!!!

At 11:22 AM, Blogger _z. said...

I did say sometimes... didn't I?

cheers... thanks for dropping a line.

that's coz you're in urban and architecture studies... isn't it?

At 11:24 AM, Blogger _z. said...

some do know what is black coffee. :P


the mechanic automatism of a job where you do the same thing everyday... bless them.

At 12:01 PM, Blogger _z. said...

I am a patient dude usually.

c'est partout de meme I think. It is those big chains! they complicate things.

At 2:05 PM, Blogger Liliane said...

#@&(#&(@#&* F*ck Sh*T f@##&*@ word verification!!!

Anyway rou2 ya clint rou2 :D

At 11:25 PM, Blogger jooj said...

I usually take it black as well and on dismal days I might add 1/2 sugar. Never with milk or cream. They get in the way of taste.

Happy new year Z.

At 5:07 AM, Blogger Red said...

You just can't get the staff these days.

At 8:09 AM, Blogger an OTHER human being.. said...

I guess the bitch/waitress drank the same after you left..

Dark, black, cynical coffee.. with wiped tears on top..

Can't a girl get a normal part-time job anymore!!!!

At 10:08 AM, Blogger _z. said...

wasn't that frustrated... you chill!

happy new year to you too jooj... where did you vanish into?

At 10:12 AM, Blogger _z. said...

this is the automatism of generic chain service.

an other human being...
I rush to say that the usage of the word "bitch" was only for literary purposes. but you already know that don't you? you should.
also the frustration depicted in the text, was not verbally nor physically expressed or shown. It was kept within, and expressed only here for the scrutiny of righteous people like yourself.

At 10:36 AM, Blogger an OTHER human being.. said...

Bless you my Child..

At 6:24 PM, Blogger poshlemon said...


haha, I was thinking along the lines of sharing the same astrological sign but I'll go for your interpretation ;)

At 2:06 PM, Blogger Super Dude said...

Here is the perfect commentary about today's coffee, by Denis Leary.

Contains traces of nuts, viewer discretion is advised.

At 12:56 PM, Blogger Mar said...

Smack the bitch up!

At 5:33 PM, Blogger _z. said...

super dude_
that was very bitter indeed.

this is song!

At 7:52 PM, Blogger laila said...

z, today i made the mistake of asking about the difference between a skinny and a low fat and a non fat latte (which im very highly addicted to at the moment. i mean i was so sick this morning and it was freezing outside but i HAD to go out and get one!!) because i dont need more confusion in my life. i still dont understand. (by the way i love that coffee rant youtube video!! very kramer-y!)

At 11:02 AM, Blogger Zee said...

Hey you other "Z"!
Pretty funny story. I run into similar situations from time to time, must be a "Z" thing conspiracy.

At 9:35 PM, Blogger _z. said...

So you still didn't get the difference? I don't even bother to ask. I even have a problem with the many kinds of milks out there.

Monsieur zee! Everybody is out to get us man...

At 3:07 AM, Blogger MMMMMMMMM said...

up-selling!!!! I hate it when it happens to me. Try it at Mcdonalds!!

Me: hi I need 1 big mac meal
her: medium or large?
Me: isn't there a regular size?
her: of course there is.
Me (silently) then why didn't you say regular, medium, or large?
Me: so please give me the regular size (Bitch!!!)

At 5:34 AM, Blogger an OTHER human being.. said...

Me: .. and Coke, please.
The Bitch: Regular or large, sir?
Me: who gives a f..k when you can have a refill!!

At 1:40 PM, Blogger _z. said...

I don't do McDonald's mate... I get stomach aches...
you should watch "super size me"

an other human being_
see! I told you.

At 5:50 AM, Anonymous said...

"super size me"
great documentary!

lovely post...

At 10:29 AM, Blogger _z. said...
it is a great documentary isn't it?

thanks for the props.

At 4:17 PM, Blogger MMMMMMMMM said...

another human being,

nice one :D i don't know i forgot to mention it, although it pisses me like hell!


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